On things to do that aren't my job

Okay, so when things start piling up at work and I start to feel overwhelmed, nothing calms my nerves like a little bit of procrastinating, lollygagging, shaking down the stove, and wandering around at Go Fug Yourself.

Finish reading this, count to five, and then go right over there to find out why:

So what I'm saying is: I'm glad to be out of the house, I wish I had worn pants, and I'm pretty sure that I'm going to fire everyone even my mom.