Okay, so I'm sure you've all been over to Doug's blog to hear his woeful tale of the bitch who dumped him to his voicemail, and I am not even kidding, his voicemail. Just in case anyone was wondering and thought the fact should be submitted to the record: That is not even okay. There is no excuse, short of breathless dying words, for dumping someone to his/her voicemail (and those dying words had still better be, "Baby, you know I love you more than anything, but I won't be able to see you anymore after my brain ceases to function in about twelve seconds, and I feel awful about that").
I'm not even going to mention her name, because it's not worth mentioning, and she's less than a human being for doing what she did. Doug's taking it pretty well, all told, because that's the kind of guy he is, but I feel no compulsion whatsoever to do the same. If I need to cut a bitch, don't think I won't. Seriously.
And that's why this Friday Not-Even-Random Ten goes out to The Bitch Who Dumped Doug To His Voicemail. Honey, you have less than a soul. Don't run into me. Ever.
1. Annie Sellick, "How Insensative"
2. EMF, "Unbelievable"
3. Beck, "Loser"
4. Dixie Chicks, "Bitter End"
5. Coldplay, "Yellow"
6, Injected, "Faithless"
7. Home Grown, "Suffer"
8. Bon Jovi, "You Give Love a Bad Name"
9. Cibo Matto, "Know Your Chicken"
10. Green Day, "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)"
And for Doug:
11. Ben Folds Five, "Song for the Dumped"
Your Ten and/or best time-tested revenge suggestions go below.