Okay, so on Sunday, we got to watch as John McCain boldly walked, barefoot, uphill both ways, through the marketplace in Baghdad and came out without a scratch, proving that Iraq is perfectly safe and peaceful and the surge is working and the insurgents are on the run and democracy is on the march and if anything at all is going wrong in Iraq it's because people back home AREN'T CLAPPING HARD ENOUGH and why do you hate America, pessimists?
Here's a picture of John McCain on his afternoon stroll:
Note the 100 American troops, three Blackhawk helicopters, and two Apache gunships that have joined him for companionship on his walk, and also note the jaunty flak vest that is sure to become a staple of every man's working wardrobe.
Incidentally, two days later 21 Shia workers from that same market were ambushed, bound, and shot dead, but that one isolated incident doesn't make the place any less safe than, say, any open-air market in Indiana where similar kidnappings and murders might take place.
And that's why this Friday Not-Even-Random Ten is dedicated to John McCain, for his fearlessness in venturing into what's totally not a war zone, even a little, and for his bold contribution to men's fashion. May God help me if the streets of Birmingham ever become as safe as the market square in Baghdad.
1. Remy Zero, "I'm Not Afraid"
2. Lou Reed, "Walk on the Wild Side"
3. Men Without Hats, "Safety Dance"
4. Aerosmith with Run-D.M.C., "Walk This Way"
5. Massive Attack, "Safe From Harm"
6. Johnny Cash, "Don't Take Your Guns to Town"
7. Beastie Boys, "Looking Down the Barrel of a Gun"
8. The White Stripes, "Seven Nation Army"
9. U2, "Walk On"
10. The Rolling Stones, "Gimme Shelter"
And one bonus track, just because it's Good Friday:
11. Pietro Mascagni, "Easter Hymn" from Cavalleria Rusticana
Your Ten goes in comments.